195.8

195.8 - it is what the scale said this morning. That is the number that keeps running through my brain. That is what I have been obsessing about all morning. 195.8. How did I get here? How did it let myself go so much? Why can't I stop over eating and over induldging? I have a lot of questions and a lot of thinking to do. But right now, all I can think about it is 195.8